I was blessed to be able to do my first day of 10k training at Cannon Beach, where Daniel and Ethan and I are spending a few days enjoying some time as a family. I've decided to use the Podrunner Intervals training program from the same guy who did the Couch to 5k set. I think the address is www.djsteveboy.com for anyone who is interested.
Daniel and Ethan spend 45 minutes swinging in the park while I jogged back and forth through downtown Cannon Beach and up into some of the residential neighborhoods. I got smirked at by some teenage girl. I'm not sure if it's because she felt sorry for me because I was running, or if perhaps my ridiculous bed hair (why bother fixing it if I'm going to be sweaty and need a shower?) caught her attention. Either way, I felt a little embarrassed at first. But then I thought to myself... why be emberassed? I'm out running and taking care of my body. And, I just ran my first 5k race a week ago... so what does it matter what a teenager thinks of me? It's nice to be building some confidence in myself as I start taking better care of the body the Lord's given me.
Usually when I run, I've got that voice in my head telling me , "everyone is staring at you and laughing at the fat girl running." That voice use to keep me from trying any sort of physical activity in front of other people. Now I just remind myself that at that moment - when I'm running - I'm doing the best thing I can do to take care of my body. I'm not sitting on my fat booty anymore! I'm dragging that booty through town at a slow jog. Haha. :)
Speaking of loosing my booty... I've hit some sort of plateau in the weight-loss realm. Since January of this year I've lost 20 lbs, and since Ethan's birth (over a year ago) I've lost close to 75 lbs. Granted, over 10lbs of that WAS Ethan... but it's still nice to include that number. All in all, I think I've probably lost about 55 lbs since this time last year. Which feels pretty good.
I think the next step is to pay real attention to the foods I'm eating and start making some life changes. I've tried all sorts of diets and food restrictions, but they never work for the long haul because they aren't permanent changes. I don't know if it's realistic for me to swear off chocolate, or coffee, or ice cream... because the thought of living life without those things sends me into such a panic that I always end up having a "one last time" binge and then falling off the wagon anyway. I think the real solution will be found in focusing on what TO eat, rather than what not to eat. I'm using a trial version of a computer-based meal planning program that doubles as a food journal. I'm emberassed to say that the first three days I've recorded have boasted 3 consecutive 4000 calorie days. It's a miracle that I'm just plateauing and not gaining at this point! There are some big life changes ahead for me, and I'm sure that some of those changes will be emotional. It's strange how food can be such an emotional addiction and a coping mechanism, isn't it? I'll keep you all posted as I take each step along the way. It's been an encouragement to have everyone's support and loving comments - so keep 'em up!